LISTEN: The anal sex anthem urging you to ‘Relax’

If there is one anal sex tip that gays have heard time and time again, it’s “relax.” In 1984, that archetypal advice became a catchy, homoerotic hit song among LGBTQ folks and the sexually adventurous thanks to the English pop band Frankie Goes to Hollywood.

Off their debut album Welcome to the Pleasuredome, “Relax” embodied the gay cruising culture of the ’80s in both its lyrics and a steamy music video that still makes gays of a certain age blush when recalling their own nights spent trying to do just that.

“Relax” might have been Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s most commercially memorable hit, but the band saw more astronomical success with follow up songs “Two Tribes” and “The Power of Love” — all three reaching number one on the UK Singles Chart.

Known for their provocative point of view, the band’s sexually suggestive songs got them briefly banned by the BBC. But that fact only made them more popular as part of the counterculture of the time.

“I wanted to be provocative with the way Frankie Goes to Hollywood looked and for the lyrical content to be modern and edgy,” explained lead singer Holly Johnson in a 2021 Guardian interview. “We had been living through a politically charged time, the Sex Pistols and Bow Wow Wow had made headlines, and I knew we had to do the same to make an impact.”

Then “Relax” came to fruition. Johnson explained, “’Relax’ was written in my head, and I sang it out loud to myself walking down the middle of Princes Avenue in Liverpool, laughing as I went.”

The song’s most sexually suggestive lyrics include a moment in which Johnson declares, “I’m coming/I’m coming (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah),” with affirmative grunts following. Then in another line, Johnson sings assurances that it’s alright to “come” but “shoot it in the right direction.”

In case there was any doubt about what Frankie Goes to Hollywood was insinuating with the song, the video drove “Relax’s” to the finish line. Johnson, dressed as a working stiff, is dropped off at a leather bar and immediately led into a new world by a Tom of Finland-esque figure.

Inside, Johnson becomes the object of everyone’s affection, leading to lots of fighting, pulling caressing and shouting from men in cages and a man dressed in a toga who serves as the club’s master of ceremonies, so to speak.

Overall, the video conveys lots of pageantry, cockfights and some banana licking—everything you can still find at a gay club today!

What’s more is the video was filmed at The State nightclub in Liverpool, but if you go to London today looking for the Pleasuredome, you will find a very nicely done gay bathhouse.

For two years after “Relax” was released, “Frankie Goes to Hollywood was the biggest British pop group since the Beatles and the most controversial since the Sex Pistols,” wrote music journalist Paul Lester. Then it all changed with their second album, Liverpool. The album sold significantly less copies and the band members all split up and went their separate ways.

As recent as this year, gray and middle-aged, the band has reunited and returned to doing what they do best—urging everyone to suggestively “relax” and enjoy life. Now you can enjoy a performance of “Relax” below during the Big Eurovision welcome this year.