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Mean Girls hit up Walmart, warm velvet nights & a gay pasta-making guide: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week

Matt Rogers rings in the holidays, mean Girls reunite & gay pasta-making guides: 10 things we're obsessed with this week

Mark

Nov 8, 2023 - 19:01

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Mean Girls hit up Walmart, warm velvet nights & a gay pasta-making guide: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week

This week, there’s change in the air. And germs –– flu season is coming in strong, y’all!

First off, that autumn chill is slowing giving way to winter’s edge, especially since Gay Christmas (a.k.a. Halloween) is behind us. Thankfully, this year’s gay Halloween parties gave us lots to love… and hate. And costumes from LGBTQ+ celebs Chris Olsen, Karamo Brown, and Lil Nas X left no crumbs.

The times are changing, too. Gay college basketball coach Matt Lynch made his historic debut on the court at University of South Carolina Salkehatchie. And for some reason, we’ve all rallied behind this Dollarita-loving dude from San Francisco who appeared on his local news.

Even our TV shows are different, now that we’ve got another season of HBO’s The Gilded Age to obsess over and Showtime’s Fellow Travelers made its steamy debut.

However, some things will always stay the same: the social-media algorithms continue to toss LGBTQ+ cuties our way, our favorite holiday classics are just around the corner, and retail therapy continues to be the best antidote for our gay seasonal depression. (Just being honest!)

Cozy up, light a candle, and get inspired –– or at least caffeinated. Now presenting the 10 things we’re obsessed with this week….

1. Danny Loves Pasta by Danny Freeman

Two-panel image. On the left, Danny Freeman stands in front of a white kitchen background in a gray crewneck t-shirt. He pulls a sheet of yellow pasta, with colorful hearts engrained in it, from a pasta-maker. On the right, the same image appears on his book "Danny Loves Pasta", which features rainbow colored shell noodles underneath the image. — *Image Credit: Amazon*

Danny Freeman loves pasta. (And who doesn’t?!) This queer pasta chef has garnered acclaim from Andy Cohen, SZA, and over 1.4 million TikTok followers. His debut cookbook Danny Loves Pasta arrived just in time for the holidays, and boy, he’s got a culinary-challenged gay like me considering crafting pasta from scratch. His book features easy recipes, new pasta shapes, and simple tricks to add color to your noodles. (Rainbow bowties? I think so.)

Impress the fam with your own pasta-making skills by snagging his cookbook for $22.40 on Amazon.

2. Groove Gives’ Velvet Nights Classic Candle

Two-panel image. On the left, a candle in a sepia toned cylinder sits on a glass dish next to roses and green grapes in front of a red background. The cylinder has a label that reads "Velvet Nights" with pink swirls. On the right, the same candle sits on a white sheet with an unlit wick. — *Image Credit: Groove Gives*

Eric Sedeño is one of my fave queer content creators, so I had to check out his candle biz Groove Gives, which he cofounded with his brother. Not only are their designs exceptionally chic, but they guarantee that “every candle gives back,” with each purchase feeding 15 people through a partnership with Texas food bank Minnie’s Pantry.

My personal rec is the Velvet Nights Classic Candle ($38), a flowery scent with hints of oud that simultaneously looks so cute on any coffee table or nightstand.

3. The “roast your ex” with Taylor Swift lyrics trend on TikTok

@raynostinger I see people doing their own version #nowthatwedonttalk #fyp #swiftie #swifttok #bi #lgbt #taylorswift #1989tv ♬ original sound – Toria

Taylor Swift is the world’s finest purveyor of breakup songs, and her new bop “Now That We Don’t Talk” is no exception. “I don’t have to pretend I like acid rock / Or that I’d like to be on a mega yacht / With important men / Who think important thoughts / Now that we don’t talk,” she sings on the 1989 (Taylor’s Version) track. Oof!

Fittingly, both straight and gay TikTokkers have been using that lyric to roast their own exes’ red flags. From liking escargot, judgy friends, to using their own semen as facial cleanser (seriously), I’m LIVING for the public reckonings.

4. Have You Heard of Christmas? by Matt Rogers

Matt Rogers has the voice (and looks) of an angel, so it’s only fitting that his debut album is satirical holiday LP Have You Heard of Christmas. The record features songs from his hysterical Showtime special (including “Lube for the Sleigh” and sexy Martha May Whovier serenade “Hottest Female Up in Whoville”), as well as new additions, like generic-good-wishes bop “Everything You Want” with MUNA. This is not your grandma’s holiday album, and thank God. Stream this instant classic on Spotify or Apple Music now, or snag it on vinyl for $25.98.

5. These kitschy ornaments from Urban Outfitters

Three-panel image of glass ornaments hanging in front of the same gray background. On the far left, a can resembling a White Claw seltzer hands with a Santa hat. The label reads "White Claus Hard Seltzer. Spiced Apple" with a snowflake design. In the middle, a triangular glass resembling a martini glass hands with a fake green olive floating in the middle. On the far right, a glass fried chicken drumstick hangs with a bite out of it, revealing "white meat" under the "browned skin." — *Image Credit: Urban Outfitters*

My love for glass ornaments is likely a fetish passed down from my mother, who’s known to purchase any bauble in sight… if it’s glittery enough. As a means of grasping at the final breaths of my youth (and making up for a general lack in visual aesthetic), I’ve been building up my collection of off-kilter ornaments to decorate with each year. Urban Outfitters is typically unmatched in their Millennial-esque assortment, and this year I’ve got my eyes on the Santa White Claus Seltzer Ornament ($14), the quirky Fried Chicken Ornament ($18), and, of course, the extremely classy Martini Ornament ($20).

6. Dolly/Reba ’24 Tee

Two-panel image. On the far left, a navy t-shirt reading "Dolly/Reba" in white and "24" in red lays spread open. The text resembles a political advertisement. A pink snapback hat and brown shorts sit on top of the shirts lower left corner for display. On the right, the same shirt but zoomed in to show detail in the text. — *Image Credit: Music City Creative*

Music City Creative is an eco-friendly and LGBTQ+-owned print shop based in Nashville, where the gay agenda can use all the help it can get. Aside from their inclusive message, I just love how much they get the queer community. They’re not merely slapping a rainbow on a tee and calling it a day; there’s thought here. Case-and-point: their “Y’all Means All” collection and the Bass Shop Pro-spoofing “*ss Eating Pro” Hat ($21.99), which is a personal fave.

Still, nothing beats their clever Dolly/Reba ’24 Tee for $21.99. Finally, a team we can stand by!

7. Brenda Lee dropping a music video for her 1958 Christmas classic… this year

The lore behind Brenda Lee’s “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” is fascinating. The 78-year-old pop singer recorded the track at just 13-years-old, and it’s become a seasonal classic (and one of my all-time faves). Thanks to a 2014 rule change by Billboard, the song is now able to re-chart on the Hot 100, and it’s peaked at No. 2 every year since 2019… behind Mariah Carey.

This year, Lee’s got her eyes on a charttopper. She’s following Carey’s playbook with her very own “It’s time” meme, and releasing the first-ever music video for the track, featuring Trisha Yearwood and Tanya Tucker. Honestly, I’m rooting for her!

8. Mean Girls reuniting for a Walmart commercial

This is not an ad for Walmart’s Black Friday deals. But it’s not-not an ad for their new Mean Girls commercial. The Plastics –– minus Rachel McAdams who “didn’t want to do it,” which I respect –– supply so many callbacks and references that I had to give the 2-minute clip a second watch.

Cady (Lindsay Lohan) is now a North Shore counselor! Amanda Seyfried’s portrayal of Karen is positively method! And Lacey Chabert is still trying to make “fetch” happen! It may not be the sequel we wanted, but it’s the reunion we deserved.

9. Threshold 12oz Glass Mugs & Zassenhaus Wood Serving Board

Three-panel image. On the far left, a wooden serving board from a bird's eye view. A spoon lays on top of it next to a glass mug, filled with cider and an orange slice. In the middle, the same glass cup is pictured straight on with a coffee mixture swirling inside. On the far right, the same wooden board is shown from a straight-on angle with a peeled blood orange and knife sitting on its surface. — *Image Credit: Target*

In this house, Target is a safe space (and one where I cannot be trusted with a credit card). Hence, their new campaign rebranding the traditional Thanksgiving/Friendsgiving as “Brunch-giving” spoke to my soul. Not only are they supplying us with apple cider mimosa and turkey quiche recipes, they’ve got the cutest dishes to serve them with. Thankfully, Threshold’s 12oz Glass Mugs are only $6 a piece, which helped me budget for the gorgeous 18″ Zassenhaus Wood Serving Board ($59.95).

10. Benito Skinner dressing as the Starbucks mermaid

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A post shared by Benito Skinner (@bennydrama7)

She’s the icon. She’s the moment. She’s a mermaid whose image is engrained in my brain after so many Starbies runs. And comedian Benito Skinner certainly did her justice with his Halloween costume this year.