Pam Bondi crucified, MAGA bros jump ship, Gavin Newsom calls You-Know-Who “scum”

So much WH chaos, so little time ...

beltway briefs

While Ricky Martin’s armpit and Andy Cohen’s new era tried to keep our minds off of the Chaos-in-Chief, the red hat cultists, unqualified cabinet members and autocrats in the White House were busy doing all sorts of things amid you may have missed. Here’s just a few of the stories you really need to know about…

CANCUN TED STRIKES AGAIN: Anti-LGBTQ+ Texas Senator Ted Cruz got caught ditching his constituents during a crisis again, this time for a lavish European vacay. [Read more]

WHO’S NEXT: After expunging any reference to transgender individuals, the GOP has now erased all mentions of bisexuals from Stonewall Monument webpages. [Read more]

Politics, but make it gay!

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RED, WHITE & BLONDE: Embattled Attorney General Pam Bondi continued to face extreme backlash from the MAGA cult – including FBI Director Dan Bongino and nutjob Lara Loomer- for her failure to release the Epstein Files and then scrambled to discredit a DOJ whistleblower. [Read more]

GOOD LUCK WITH THAT: On the heels of Elon Musk’s WH humiliation, billionaire gay tech bro Sam Altman appeared to lay the groundwork for a political career. [Read more]

EQUALITY FOR NONE: The GOP obstructed a voter effort to protect marriage equality and trans rights in Ohio. [Read more]

THE GREAT AWAKENING: After being bamboozled by the convicted felon president, MAGA podcast bro Andrew Schulz – who cast his vote for TACO – has finally realized what a lying sack of sh*t 47 actually is. Looks like Pete Buttigieg smacked some sense into these dudes during his viral appearance on their Flagrant podcast in April.

ICED BY BARBIE: Anderson Cooper explained how how Homeland Secretary Kristi “ICE Barbie” Noem may have been responsible for the delayed response to the Texas floods. [Read more]

TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDICINE: CA Governor Gavin Newsom bashed the latest dystopian ICE crackdown where protestors were sprayed with tear gas by calling the convicted felon president “the real scum.” A play on the Cheeto-In-Chief’s propensity for calling the Democrat “Newscum.” [Read more]

KARMA: The Epstein Files backlash keeps getting louder and keeps sinking the Garbage President. ???????? Keep Googling Epstein Files!!!

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