JD Vance tried to pick a fight with the Pope & got dragged by a half-empty room instead
You know you messed up when the Pope has to issue a spanking
Mark
Certified loser JD Vance spoke to a nearly empty arena last night, and still managed to get bodied by hecklers. At a Turning Point USA conference, Vance appeared to threaten Pope Leo XIV after the pontiff’s feud with Tr*mp, spoke back to hecklers accusing him of war crimes, and generally revealed how much of a clown he is, as if we didn’t know.
In a disastrously poor choice of words, Vance cautioned the Pope to “be careful” when talking theology… as if that’s not the Pope’s primary job that he’s been training for his entire life.
Naturally, audience members were not having it. One heckler tried to call Vance to account, screaming “you’re killing children” in the middle of the Vice President’s Godfather-esque warning to the Pope.
How about we take this to the next level?
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Noting that he appreciated the Pope being “an advocate for peace,” Vance still felt comfortable making some weirdly threatening remarks about how Leo should stick to the “truth” of theology. You know, like the stuff about people walking on water and having conversations with flaming bushes in the desert.
The problem here is that the Pope has every right to speak on theology and JD Vance is a ranch-dipped loser who couldn’t figure out how to broker a peace deal with Iran. So it’s less a case of David and Goliath and more a case of Vance refusing to abandon the sinking ship of the Tr*mp presidency.
This L is just one in a host of repeated, embarrassing failures with Vance’s name all over them. His adventures in Greenland last year completely failed, his attempt to push Germany even further to the right also failed, and his recent endorsement of Hungary’s would-be dictator Viktor Orban had the opposite of the intended effect.
Still, Vance insists on persisting.
“How can you say that God is never on the side of those who wield the sword?” Vance asked the audience at last night’s conference, referencing the Pope’s open condemnation of Tr*mp’s massively unpopular war on Iran.
But while Vance may have thought he did something with his examples of the liberation of Nazi camps and the American Revolution, the dwindling TPUSA audience was not having it—and neither was the Pope, who entered the chat last night.
“Democracy remains healthy… only when rooted in the moral law and a true vision of the human person,” Pope Leo wrote in a letter released yesterday by the Vatican. “Lacking this foundation, it risks becoming either a majoritarian tyranny or a mask for the dominance of economic and technological elites.”
The actual Pope getting into an unholy war with Tr*mp’s loser army was not on our bingo card, but suddenly we’re invested, and so were the hecklers who likely made up most of the pathetically-attended TPUSA event last night. Between the shots of unfilled seats and footage of Vance trying (and failing) to keep his cool in the chaos, it’s not looking good for the man who Tr*mp openly plans to throw under the bus for failing to keep the peace in Iran.
“Does Mr. Vance still not realize that the joke is on him?” A New York Times opinion writer asked last week. “The interesting thing is not that he keeps debasing himself but that he gets less and less in return each time.”
You can say that again!
Pretty soon, Vance’s stock will have fallen below the MyPillow level. And speaking of pillows, there’s one thing we’re still dying to know: what is the Catholic Church’s official stance on man-couch love?
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