Jerry Seinfeld bemoans the decline of masculinity, yearns for a Dom Top: “I like a real man”

Jerry Seinfeld wants to know… what’s the deal with dominant men?! They were here one day, and gone the next!

The fastidious comedian, whose autobiographical TV character wore jeans and sneakers every day into his late 30s, spent hours complaining about life’s trivialities in a coffee shop and played with PEZ dispensers, apparently misses a patriarchal society.

In an interview on Bari Weiss’ podcast, Seinfeld reminisces about the mid-20th century, when masculinity ruled the world.

How about we take this to the next level?

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“We have no sense of hierarchy,” he said. “As humans, we don’t really feel comfortable with that. That is part of what…if you want to talk about nostalgia, that is part of what makes [the 1960s] attractive looking back.”

At this point in the conversation, Seinfeld appears to be just another embittered, rich boomer male comedian, in the same mold as Bill Maher or Billy Crystal. He often complains about cancel culture, despite centering his standup act around milquetoast observations about airline travel and seedless watermelons.

In a recent interview with the New Yorker, Seinfeld blames the “extreme left” for ruining comedy.

“It used to be you would go home at the end of the day, most people would go, ‘Oh, Cheers is on, oh, M.A.S.H. is on, oh, Mary Tyler Moore is on,” he said. “You just expected, there’ll be some funny stuff we can watch on TV tonight. Well, guess what? Where is it? This is the result of the extreme left and PC crap, and people worrying so much about offending other people.”

Always one to push the boundaries, Seinfeld has been promoting his poorly received Netflix comedy, Unfrosted, an inaccurate portrayal about the invention of pop tarts. (The 70-year-old comedian has been joking about pop tarts for 13 years, observing they can’t get stale… because they were never fresh!)

But in his conversation with Weiss, Seinfeld goes far beyond lamenting about the evolution of humor. He bemoans the decline of… dominant masculinity.

“Another thing, as a man… I always wanted to be a real man,” he said. “When I was in that era, it was JFK, Muhammad Ali, Sean Connery, Howard Cosell. That’s a real man! I wanted to be like that someday. Well, no. I never really grew up. You don’t want to as a comedian because it’s a childish pursuit. I miss a dominant masculinity. I get the toxic thing… but still I like a real man.”

Delving deeper, Seinfeld says a modern day example of dominant masculinity is the actor Hugh Grant, who stars in Unfrosted.

“That’s why I love Hugh Grant,” he said. “Because he felt like one of those guys I wanted to be. He knows how to dress, he knows how to talk, he’s charming, he has stories, he’s comfortable at dinner parties, he knows how to get a drink … I love those movements of style.”

It’s quite telling, of course, that most of Seinfeld’s examples of “real men” are actors and TV personalities–not men with difficult and physical jobs. It’s almost as if he’s role playing.

Speaking of which… maybe he is?

Jerry Seinfeld when he sees a dominant masculine man https://t.co/OM40HdylXt pic.twitter.com/dsSIibEfHL— Tom Zohar (@TomZohar) May 29, 2024

I like letting people be who they are authentically. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. https://t.co/CsqE48Bkyg— Anthony Michael Kreis (@AnthonyMKreis) May 29, 2024

https://t.co/BHj9sunImB pic.twitter.com/7U8pFZzTUj— jes tom (@jestom) May 29, 2024

https://t.co/ezdwPRJ1zz pic.twitter.com/W2v0fMI0tr— Jacob Bacharach (@jakebackpack) May 29, 2024

Maybe the weirdest guy to say this. Your whole thing is liking comic books and breakfast cereal, what are you TALKING about? https://t.co/zsYGqbe8sX— Cody Johnston (@drmistercody) May 29, 2024

Interestingly enough, one of the more memorable lines from Seinfeld–“not that there’s anything wrong with that!”–emanates from Jerry being mistaken for a gay man. An NYU student writing a story about Jerry wrongly assumes that he and George are a gay couple, because they spend so much time together… and Jerry is lean, fit and neurotic.

Whenever Jerry denies his gayness, he includes the important caveat.

The episode is actually hilarious, and ends with George pretending he’s gay to break up with his then-girlfriend (it doesn’t work). George, perhaps the true protagonist of Seinfeld, is based off of Larry David.

As Seinfeld becomes more embittered, it’s apparent that David is maybe the real comedic genius of the two. For example: one of them makes fun of Bari Weiss, while the other appears on her podcast.

Larry David teaches us how to slam a door when someone mentions Bari Weiss. pic.twitter.com/Cve7L1UELA— Rafael Shimunov (@rafaelshimunov) February 22, 2022

Thank you, Larry!