Nikki Haley’s campaign reaches peak cringe just ahead of the Iowa primary

Nikki Haley may have whiffed when she didn’t say the Civil War was about slavery. But did you know she had Black friends growing up???

The ex-South Carolina governor, who’s rising in Republican polls despite lacking any political instincts or charisma, tried to explain away her gaffe just ahead of the Iowa primary, which happens January 15.

It didn’t go well.

“I should’ve said slavery right off the point. But if you grow up in South Carolina, literally in second and third grade you learn about slavery,” she said. “You grow up, and you have, you know, I had Black friends growing up!”

No need to say any more, sister! Nimarata Nikki Haley is beyond caricature.

"I mean, I watched almost all of the Roots series."— Mike Morton (@TheMikeMorton) January 5, 2024

With Haley now only trailing Donald Trump by four points in New Hampshire, GOP donors are trying to line up behind her should she somehow find a way to clinch the party’s nomination. But she seems determined to squash her momentum.

The real trouble began last week, when a Granite State voter asked her the cause of the Civil War, and she replied with “freedom.” She initially backtracked when her ridiculous claim went viral, only to double down and blame a “Democratic plant” for her misstep.

But now, she’s in total spin mode and she still can’t address the question properly. Haley’s response to the controversy has been so bad, she was even confronted about it on Fox News.

Amazingly, Haley and Ron “Don’t Say Gay” DeSantis both participated Thursday in CNN’s town hall, and she came off looking more disingenuous, which is really, really hard to do.

But there she was, talking about the need for kids to take off their shoes and empty their pockets before heading into first grade.

“We have to secure our schools the same way we secure our airports and our courthouses,” she said.

Haley went on to list an array of dystopian security measures she would like to see schools undertake.

“We have to do whatever we need to to make sure nothing comes through, bullet-wise or otherwise,” she said. “We need to have a security officer at the front of every school.”

“We need to have one-point entries, no side or rear entries. Then we need to make sure we have someone on staff—not a guidance counselor—but a mental health counselor who does nothing but look and see which kids may be in crisis. Let’s start there. That’s at least doing something.”

Or.. .you could try enacting more restrictions on guns.

But nope, Nihilistic Nikki says that wouldn’t work. Security guards and metal detectors are much more sensible!

Nikki Haley: "We have to secure our schools the same way we secure our airports and courthouses" pic.twitter.com/6DCrQwbKFH— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) January 5, 2024

Going forward, maybe it’s better for Haley to avoid talking about firearms altogether. It usually doesn’t go well for her…

Haley’s craven pandering is on full display whenever she talks about LGBTQ+ issues. Last week, she released a video decrying the military for forcing recruits to enroll in “gender pronoun classes.”

Girl, what?

For the record: The military does not require new recruits to enroll in “gender pronoun classes,” which, BTW, aren’t even a real thing.

At the last GOP debate, Haley tried to assert herself as the most homophobic person on stage, only for her plan to backfire.

Even though Haley has nudged past DeSantis in national polling, she still trails Trump by more than 50 points. It’s apparent the nomination is out of play (maybe barring Trump actually keeling over from a heart attack or campaigning from prison), so why is she debasing herself like this?

Her rivals think it’s because she wants to be Trump’s VP.

Chris Christie said Haley would “eat glass” for the opportunity, and DeSantis called her “phony.”

Meanwhile, Trump allies are letting it known they are adamantly opposed to Haley joining the ticket. Maybe a few more misstatements about the Civil War will do the trick!

Nope, probably not.