Report describes Trump “edging” Biden in the polls & now everyone’s mind is in the gutter

Friendly reminder: word choice is always important.

Especially when you’re talking about the 2024 election.

Perhaps Uber Facts –– a website and social media account that shares daily random certitudes –– could use a reminder.

Politics, but make it gay!

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But honestly, they probably knew exactly what they were doing when they posted, “Donald Trump is edging Joe Biden in the polls” earlier this week.

Yep! You read that correctly. And sorry for putting that image in your head!

While trying to describe the two politicians’ neck and neck race (which Newsweek also reported on this week), they used the word “edging.”

Also known as the slang term for “coming nearly close to climax or ejaculation, then purposefully stopping sexual stimulation in order to delay the same, so that the ultimate climax will be more intense,” according to Urban Dictionary. Not to be confused with “gooning.”

The post has been viewed 12.3 million times and counting.

So naturally, social media was not going to let them get away with such a flagrant display of covert horniness.

To be fair, this is hardly the first time the word has been used in the context of an election.

But it might be time to rethink our vocabularies, considering gays and straights have co-opted the term –– and even Medical News Today has an article on the “generally … safe practice.”

(That being said, we don’t know which is worse: Trump edging Biden or this 2000 pairing between Bush and Gore. Again, sorry for the mental image!)

Innuendos aside, the 2024 election is no laughing matter –– or mindless jerk sesh –– for the LGBTQ+ community.

As the frontrunner for the Republican ticket, Trump has been working overtime to cosign the conservatives’ fight against trans rights.

In a video posted on Truth Social (ew), Trump vowed to “stop” gender-affirming care for children if elected, intimating his ban would also extend to people of “any age.”

“The left-wing gender insanity being pushed at our children is an act of child abuse,” he said. “Very simple.”

Which is certainly a far cry from the man bragging his administration “did great with the gay population” back in 2022.

(We’ll also never forgive him for letting his daughter Tiffany speak to the gays on his behalf at this cringe-worthy 2020 event.)

On the other hand, the Biden-Harris administration recently reversed a Trump-era “License to Discriminate” rule, restoring “protections and requirements” for patients, regardless of a provider’s belief.

And in his 2023 State of the Union address, Biden voiced his support for trans and non-binary youth, as well as the need for Congress to pass the Equality Act “to ensure LGBTQ Americans, especially transgender young people, can live with safety and dignity.”

(@Congress, we’re still waiting! Where’s a shameless Taylor Swift Pride music video when you need it?!)

Nevertheless, according to Newsweek, “Biden narrowly beats Trump in two of the last six serious surveys,” while “Trump leads in three and one is tied.”

So, it’s looking like we’ve got a very tense, close, and emotionally-fraught election year ahead!

Forgive us if we have to laugh at some edging jokes now and then to stop ourselves from crying.

Check out more of the funniest reactions to Trump “edging” Biden below.

I WOULD LIKE TO SEE THAT— print("i hate for loops") / (@deadysu) March 5, 2024