Photo Credits: Lily Gladstone, Colman Domingo via Getty Images | All other images via the 96th Academy Awards / ABC
Awards season has never felt more like a marathon, but we’ve finally reached this finish line with the 96th Annual Academy Awards!
Once again, all roads lead to the historic Dolby Theater and the Oscars—you know, “Hollywood’s Biggest Night”—and it was a proper blockbuster of a ceremony, celebrating the year’s biggest movies (Barbenheimer: Round 2!) and the biggest stars (Messi the dog from Anatomy Of A Fall!).
Four-time host Jimmy Kimmel host kept things moving at an impressive clip—while frequently riffing on the show’s long history of going over time—and a series of inspired presenter pairs livened up the proceedings, complete with some show-stopping musical numbers that really brought the Kenegy.
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In the end, Oppenheimer was the evening’s big winner, taking home a total of 7 Oscars (including Best Picture and Best Director), though Poor Things also had a showing that was anything put poor. And don’t worry, Barbie fans, it may have only won one trophy this year, but it certainly was a huge presence throughout the show.
Even if the winner of the final award was a little expected, there were still plenty of fun surprises along the way, including some moments that had all the gays talking.
Put on your jammies, pop open a bottle of bubbly, and get settled in because it’s Oscars night (a.k.a. The Gay Super Bowl).
Jimmy Kimmel shoots his shot with Ryan Gosling
Kimmel didn’t miss a beat with his quippy opening monologue, which began with him strutting out on stage to Dua Lipa’s “Dance The Night” from Barbie, starting things out on a very gay foot. But it only got gayer, as he referenced Madame Web—a movie apparently only gays went to see—and shouted out queer stars like Jodie Foster and Colman Domingo. Plus, he couldn’t resist the opportunity to flirt with Ryan Gosling (who wouldn’t?), pausing to remark that the actor is “so hot” before going in for the kill: “Let’s go camping together and not tell our wives.”
Jimmy Kimmel to Ryan Gosling: "You're so hot. Let's go camping together and don't tell our wives"
Fifteen years ago, the Oscars shook up its standard format by inviting past acting winners to honor the year’s nominees (devised, in part, by out director Bill Condon, who produced the show that year). Time-consuming? Of course. But it was an innovation that created true magic on stage—who wouldn’t want to see legendary actresses passing the baton to their colleagues?
For some odd reason, it didn’t become an immediate tradition, but after all this time we finally got our wish: they brought it back! If you weren’t already sold on it, surely seeing Mary Steenburgen, Lupita Nyong’o, Jamie Lee Curtis, Rita Moreno, and Regina King celebrate the Best Supporting Actress nominees (including eventual winner Da’vine Joy Randolph, with an incredible speech) did the trick? The women were getting visibly choked up—and so were we!
There is no greater dopamine rush than five Supporting Actress Oscar winners walking towards you— samantha roomba (@samcorb) March 10, 2024
Chippendales to the rescue
Longtime besties Octavia Spencer and Melissa McCarthy staked an early claim at best presenting pair of the night, called on to announce the winners of Best Adapted and Best Original Screenplay and launching into a bit about dynamic duos. McCarthy likened them to Disney chipmunks Chip & Dale, but Spencer heard Chippendale, and suddenly all anyone could think about ripped men wearing bowties and little else, thrusting the air.
Saw someone say Melissa and Octavia should do a buddy comedy. There has been one sitting on Netflix for like 3 years now……— The Ghost of Glenda Ms. Jackson if Ya Nasty (@kbaileyjava2) March 10, 2024
Just Billie, a mic, Finneas at the piano, a whole lot of pink light—that’s all it took to bring a hush over the room. We’ve seen Eilish perform the Grammy-winning song live once before, and honestly she started off perhaps a little more nervous this time? But, like a true pro, she eased her way into it, and by the time the orchestra was revealed, she stepped into the song’s power and was grinning brightly at the end. Cue Barbie star Kate McKinnon wildly shouting, “WOOOOOOOOO!” right into the camera.
When Kimmel referenced the streaker at the 46th Oscars—one of the wildest unscripted moments in the show’s history—it was clear he was setting something up. Maybe Barry Keoghan would take the stage, nodding to that unforgettable Saltburn scene? But, no, we got muscle man John Cena in the buff, peeking out from side-stage and ready to bail on the bit: “The male body is not a joke!” Still, he had a job to do, and after Kimmel handed him an oversized envelope, Cena shuffled out to the mic in nothing more than some flip-flops, and the audience was treated to a couple hundred pounds of flesh. The kicker? He was there to present Best Costume Design.
As Jon Batiste played his nominated song “It Never Went Away” from his documentary American Symphony (which was not nominated!), we were treated to a montage of Oscar-worthy romances, including a brief clip of Jake Gyllenhaal’s Jack Nasty Twist and Heath Ledger’s Ennis Del Mar from Brokeback Mountain, a moment that no doubt made gays everywhere sit up a cheer.
After a quick tequila toast from Kimmel’s sidekick Guillermo to Colman “Flamingo,” Barbie co-stars McKinnon and America Ferrera stepped on stage to present Best Documentary and Best Documentary Short, launching into an honestly impeccable bit where McKinnon learned the hard truth that, no, the Jurassic Park films were not documentaries—meaning *gasp* that Jeff Goldblum wasn’t real either, according to Ferrera. “Then who have I been sending my tasteful nudes to?,” McKinnon wondered in horror. Cut to: Steven Spielberg pointing to himself with an exasperated look on his face. Perfection! *chef’s kiss*
Comedian John Mulaney was a hysterical presenter—the funniest of the entire show, for our money—going on an extended bit about 1989’s Field Of Dreams, but not before he could reference some of the most iconic quotes in cinema history. And of course, he couldn’t forget: “He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders just before she died,” which didn’t actually end up in Madame Web, but who’s counting? That’s come to a grand total of two references for the new camp classic!
“I’m Just Ken” brings down the Mojo Dojo Casa House
Let’s be real: This was the moment we’d been waiting for all night—and Ryan Gosling & co. did not disappoint. The most ambitious musical number of the show kicked off with Gosling singing from the audience, decked out in a studded pink suit, complete with kinky pink latex gloves, and it only got more outrageous from there, evolving into a hilarious Gentlemen Prefer Blondes homage. Frankly, the actor sounded amazing live and the theatrics went down all around him, including Guns N’ Roses’ Slash shredding on guitar, a mass of male dancers, Mark Ronson’s chest hair, and cameos from more Kens—including queer Kens Ncuti Gatwa and Scott Evans (the latter of whom even got to plant a kiss on GOsling’s cheek). This was the raw shot of Ken-ergy the show needed!
The Wicked-ly talented Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande
Wearing their best Elphaba green and Glinda pink (respectively), Erivo and Grande were wisely tapped to present the evening’s musical awards. Will the Wicked movies have original songs? If so, we bet these two will be back to this stage soon! Either way, stunning and stunning—love seeing these two queens coming together to maximize their joint slay. November 26 can’t come soon enough!
We are going to see every single shade of pink and green on Ariana and Cynthia for the next two years.— Emerson Collins (@ActuallyEmerson) March 11, 2024
Billie Eilish makes more room on her trophy shelf
Usually pretty infallible at these types of awards shows (she’s taken home a lot of trophies in her 22 years), Eilish was visibly moved and even a little choked up when accepting the Best Original Song Oscar for her inescapable Barbie ballad, “What Was I Made For?” For those checking their records, this is yet another queer winner for this frequently very gay category, and makes Eilish the youngest person ever to have two Oscars!
Any gay knows that the award of the night is Best Actress, and the Oscars seemed to know that, too, making it the penultimate category presented. It was no doubt a close race, but Emma Stone claimed the award for a second time for her fearless work in Poor Things (last winning in 2016 for La La Land), besting presumed frontrunner Lily Gladstone, who would’ve made history as the first Native-American acting winner. Still, it’s hard to be too upset by Stone’s win, a performer who always delivers on screen, while also managing to produce some fantastic (queer!) indies like this year’s Problemista and upcoming Sundance fave I Saw The TV Glow. Congrats, Emma!!
And, last but certainly not least, the night’s carpet presented a nonstop runway of looks that had us gooped, gagged, and saving so many photos to our camera roll. And you know our favorite stars turned it out, from style king Colman Domingo looking classy A.F., to Young Royals cutie Omar Rudberg, to eternal goddess of the red carpet Laverne Cox—check out a few more favorites below:
