From hot Dems to gay chicken tender heirs, these are some of the queerest highlights from last night’s blue tsunami
You have our permission to lib the F out! ????
Mark
From the grave, Lindsey Graham was right. Ten years ago, the late South Carolina Senator warned that if Republicans embraced Tr*mp, they will “get destroyed.” And on Tuesday night, that’s exactly what happened.
Whomp, whomp.
In an astounding rebuke of MAGA, Democrats routed the GOP and retook control of both the House and the Senate with what could be their largest majority in two decades.
Fittingly, Graham’s old Senate seat was one of the biggest flips of the night. His baby sister Darline, with no political experience and a professed aversion to foreign policy, was foisted upon South Carolina voters. They roundly rejected her, electing the first Democrat to represent them in the Senate in 28 years.
Politics, but make it gay!
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As of Wednesday morning, Democrats control 54 seats in the Senate, flipping Texas, Iowa, South Carolina and Kansas–with Alaska and, checks notes, Mississippi possibly on the way.
After a decade of national political despair, Dems once again have permission to lib the F out. Our favorite moments from a monumental midterm election are below!
Anti-trans attacks fall flat everywhere… and especially in Texas
Republicans smeared James Talarico until the very end, peddling anti-trans and homophobic insinuations about the now-Democratic senator elect. Up against the GOP machine and hundreds of millions in spending from Elon Musk, Talarico ousted Ken Paxton by roughly 12 points.
Desperate and without a message, Republicans tried to make the race about masculinity, characterizing Talarico as “low-T.” But as it turns out, he walked away with the biggest Democratic W in Texas politics in nearly 40 years.
A senatorial trailblazer
While many LGBTQ+ Democrats won their elections, Chris Pappas, whose family invented the chicken tender, will make history as the first out gay Senator in history when he takes office in January. In his victory speech, the New Hampshire congressman thanked his “amazing husband.”
“I’m the luckiest guy because I’m married to a man that I love,” he said.
To think that an out gay man will soon occupy a seat in the same chamber in which Joe McCarthy, who helped orchestrate the Lavender Scare in the late 1940s, served is an incredible tantamount to progress. Speaking of which…
An Alabama baddie makes trans political history
The newest out trans legislator in the country is from, wait for it, Alabama?!
Allison Montgomery won a state house seat in the deep red Huntsville suburbs, defeating a Republican opponent who won by 16 points in 2022. In response to the GOP’s anti-trans rhetoric, she simply told it like it is: their fear mongering is nothing more than a pathetic political ploy.
Young men turn left
One of the prevailing stories from the 2024 election was young men turning right. Tr*mp won the disaffected group by a shocking 17 points.
Two years later, with their economic situations (or dating lives) not improving in the least, young men shifted more to the left than any other group. We hope that top banker enjoyed saying the r-word while he could…
Pronouns go back in the bio
Along similar lines: pronouns go back in the bio ASAP! If Republicans thought “Woke 1.0” was crazy, they’ve seen nothing yet.
Drinks on us at the Covid Conscious Lesbian Bar!
Hot Dems win
From Jon Ossoff’s BDE to firefighting smoke show Sam Forstag, hot Democrats won big on Tuesday as well.
Mired in the political wilderness, Dems unveiled the novel strategy of running hot dudes with conviction. While Tr*mp and MAGA apparatchiks weirdly gushed over Ohio GOP candidate Jon Husted’s rump, voters embraced the likes of Ossoff and Abdul El-Sayed.
Oh, liberalism… it makes us so lustful!
Showing booty for a blue tsunami
On Tuesday, myriad hot gays promised to show all of themselves if a blue tsunami came to shore. Fortunately for us, a dastardly data analyst followed through.
What a night indeed!
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