Queer activist’s before & after coming out transformation wows the internet
Some are praising his post-coming-out “glow up”.
Mark
An activist and influencer has seen one of his posts go viral. It’s earned praise from around the world.
Asad Zafar is non-binary and uses he/they pronouns. Born and raised in London, UK, he describes himself as “a queer Muslim social justice activist”. Asad works for The Love Tank, a not-for-profit health and wellbeing organization for underserved communities.
He came out in 2020, during the stay-at-home months. In a video posted last week, he showed videos of himself both before and after coming out.
Watch below.
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(@hausofasad)To the tune of Chappell Roan’s “Pink Pony Club”, Asad is seen happier and embracing a life with new friends who accept him for who he is.
“The difference between being alive and LIVING YOUR LIFE 
” was one well-liked reply on Instagram.
“I chose me”
In an accompanying caption, Asad said, “I cried at 2am making this lmao. The past 5 years have been a JOURNEY, internally, externally, within myself, my family, my career etc. As the youngest and only son in a Pakistani household, I DID THAT. I chose me 
“
“I’ve learnt so much about myself and the world around me,” he continued. “I’ve lost friends and family along the way but I’ve gained myself – I’m so thankful to be here, now thriving with friends I get to call my family.”
Speaking to Queerty, Asad revealed more about his coming-out journey.
“Coming out wasn’t really my choice, and it was something which was never an option for someone like me.”
Asad says a cousin threatened to out him. Before they were able to do so, Asad “mustered up the courage” to tell his mum and sister.
“The reaction was as expected: confusion, hurt, rejection and more. Growing up as the only son and youngest in a Muslim household meant that what I was telling my family went against everything we were brought up to believe.
“It’s been a journey with my family over the last four years. It’s taken humility and understanding on both sides, and we’ve come a long way. I’ve been on a journey understanding who I am when it comes to my sexuality and gender expression, and now, rather than tolerate me, they respect and hear me.
“My family has kind of split in two, my parents and siblings who understand and love me, and others who I no longer care to have in my life. This transcends sexuality and my life; coming out made me realise some people aren’t very nice people inside. Coming out made me realise there’s power in choosing me and protecting my peace.”
“Everyone’s coming out journey is unique”
Asad says he was blown away by the response to the Instagram posting.
“Seeing people’s response to this video which captures a snapshot of my life over the years, fills my heart with joy. It’s reached so many other queer people of colour who may or may not be out, and I’m able to send them support and advice because I wish I knew where to go to find that myself when I was earlier on in my queer journey.”
Asked if he has any advice for people who may be struggling to come out, Asad says, “Everyone’s coming out journey is unique. While there are shared experiences within communities, each story is deeply personal.
“From my South Asian queer perspective, I want to say this: your existence is valid, beautiful, and powerful. Even if others don’t understand you, you are meant to be here exactly as you are.
“Coming out is a process, and it looks different for everyone. Coming out can be beautiful and radical, because choosing to live authentically is powerful. But your safety is always the most important thing. If you live at home or in a place where your identity puts you at risk, please wait until it’s safe. It pains me to say this, because I am privileged to live in a country where I’m not persecuted for who I am, and I know that isn’t the reality everywhere.
“There is no rulebook for coming out. Don’t let society, or anyone else, rush you. Go at your own pace. You are perfect as you are.”
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