Jerod Mayo calling his players ‘soft’ is a slur, but it’s not homophobic

The New England Patriots stink. At 1-6, they are maybe better than only the Carolina Panthers. Now the Patriots’ new coach, Jerod Mayo, is making headlines not for anything he is doing coaching but for using a label that amounts to a slur to a football player: Soft.

“I felt like we just went out there and played soft,” Mayo said after the Patriots lost Sunday to the lowly Jacksonville Jaguars. “We’re playing soft at the moment, and when I say playing soft, that means stopping the run, being able to run the ball, and being able to cover kicks, which we weren’t able to do.”

Calling football players “soft” is the ultimate insult, especially on defense. It denotes weakness, a lack of effort and quitting.

Coming via public comments from a coach makes it sting more. Mayo seemed to recognize this since he sort of walked it back the next day, but players were more than ready to comment.

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“He’s a player. So, he’s been around it,” Raiders defensive end Maxx Crosby said of Mayo, a former linebacker. “He played at the highest level. And, you know, if that’s how he feels that’s how he feels. But, you know, I can’t speak for him. But, yeah, I would not take it lightly. You know what I mean? I would have a major issue if I was a player, especially another grown man calling you soft. I mean, those are fighting words.”

Accusing his players of being soft is a slur, but one specific to football (“soft” is a positive if we’re talking pillows or blankets or a basketball player’s jump shot, for example).

What “soft” isn’t: homophobic.

Some people might be surprised that a gay NFL fan says this, but we need to be careful when tossing around accusations of homophobia, and this is not an example of such.

Mayo’s use of soft is offensive in a football context and doesn’t translate outside the field. I thought it was a stupid and Neanderthal thing to say and would not find it motivating if I was a Patriots player. Former Patriots coach Bill Belichick agrees.

“I’m kind of hurt for those guys because to call them soft — they’re not soft,” he said on the “Pat McAfee Show.” “They were the best team in the league last year against the run. Those guys, they went out there and did it even though we couldn’t score many points offensively.

“So, I feel bad for the defensive players on that one because those guys, that’s a tough group. Jon Jones, [Davon] Godchaux, [Deatrich] Wise [Jr.], [Anfernee] Jennings, [Joshua] Uche, those are all tough players. They’ll strap it up and go. [Kyle] Dugger, I mean they are tough guys.”

It’s also an absurd characterization to call anyone who plays football soft. Players put their short- and long-term health on the line each play and there’s nothing soft about that. Every player is banged up in some way and most play through all but the most serious injury.

Mayo came across as old-school in the worst kind of way and a sign that the first-year coach is lashing out after such a bad start. I think soft could be a defining moment for him, but the only people who could feel offended are his players and none of us.

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