Latest NFL fight shows the secret reason why we need more gay men on the fields

After the Kansas City Chiefs beat the Detroit Lions on Sunday Night Football this week, one Lions player decided to put the beat down on one of the home-team guys. Big shocker, a fight ensued.

Lions Brian Branch was clearly not happy with the Lions’ 30-17 loss, only their second on the season. So instead of shaking the hand of Chiefs WR JuJu Smith-Schuster after the game as is customary, Branch punched him in the face.

This came after Branch refused a handshake from Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes.

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If only the NFL was played by a bunch of gays.

Do you know how many security guards are needed at straight bars or at straight dance parties? Depending on whom you ask, it’s about one for every 25 to 50 people.

Do you know how many you need for a gay club or party? Maybe one for every 100 guys. And that’s mostly to point to the bar, restroom or clothes check.

Why? Straight guys like to fight each other. The vast majority of gay men just don’t have that “fight or fight” attitude.

That’s the reality of tossing a bunch of straight guys into a room — and the alcohol doesn’t help. If the guys aren’t part of your “posse” and they step out of line, there’s liable to be a fight.

And if another guy hits on someone’s girlfriend? We’re talking full-on brawl.

If some rando dude hits on the boyfriend of a gay guy, he’s likely to look at it as a compliment. Or a whoooole different party to end the night.

In my 30 years of going to lots of gay bars, parties and clubs, I’ve seen literally one fight. And those boys were juiced up, I guarantee you that.

An NFL filled with gay players? Gurl, check yo’self.

Make no mistake: Gay men are plenty strong and aggressive to put up with anyone. If you think otherwise, pick a fight with Esera Tuaolo or Ryan O’Callaghan next time you see them around.

Plus, there’s this interesting tidbit Branch shared after the game about why he decided to clock Smith-Schuster and get himself suspended for the Lions’ upcoming home game against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

“I did a real childish thing,” Branch said. But then this: “I’m tired of people doing stuff in between plays and refs don’t catch it. They be trying to bully me out there.”

Gay men are really good at handling teasing and whatnot. Most of them are used to it, having heard about it in high school or even college.

What? You gonna say stuff about my boyfriend? Gurl, you just jealous.

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