Nikki Haley’s husband Michael (or maybe Bill?) is having an identity crisis & we’re all a little dumber now

Nikki Haley spent the holiday season mired in a scandal over her refusal to say the Civil War was about slavery.

Now her husband is joining the party, albeit for a much sillier reason.

Haley, like many national political figures, has published an array of autobiographies. Her first effort, Can’t Is Not an Option, was released in 2012.

How about we take this to the next level?

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In it, Haley, who was governor of South Carolina at the time, reveals a startling detail about her hubby’s first name.

It’s not actually his!

Haley cops to renaming her husband “Michael,” after deciding his actual name, “Bill,” didn’t suffice.

A political reporter for Vox discovered the passage Wednesday to great fanfare.

Haley seems to be describing a full-fledged takeover of her husband’s life, complete with the disturbing “my friends became his friends” detail.

“Bill” was now “Michael,” separated from his former life at every turn.

And Haley is boasting about it.

This would be a slay, if only her anti-gay rhetoric wasn’t so distasteful!

Well to her credit Nikki Haley is consistent. She doesn't use preferred names whether it's a trans person or her own husband.— Person Experiencing Texan-ness (@saf3spac3d) January 3, 2024

While Haley is experiencing some momentum (she’s leapfrogged Ron “Don’t Say Gay” DeSantis as the distant second choice to Trump), she continues to get bogged down in silly controversies. Her low point came at a New Hampshire town hall, when she told a voter the Civil War was about “freedom.”

Haley initially backtracked when her ridiculous claim went viral, only to double down and blame a “Democratic plant” for her misstep.

Riiiight, because Democratic operates are intent on bringing down a candidate who’s trailing the front-runner by 50 points…

When Sarah Palin is the only one defending you, it’s time to come up with another explanation!

On Wednesday, Haley told Fox News’ Harris Faulkner the South is “very comfortable” with its history, which doesn’t seem to be the case.

If it were, then wouldn’t she feel comfortable saying the Civil War was about slavery?

Haley also claimed voters aren’t talking about her gaffe.

Faulker pointed out that isn’t true.

“The media is the only one that has talked about this issue,” said Haley.

“No, that’s actually not true,” replied Faulkner.

OWNED… on Fox!

It’s apparent Haley feels the need to appeal to the most hateful kind of Republican voter, as evidenced by her various statements demonizing LGBTQ+ people.

On the heels of her Civil War remark, she released a video lambasting the military for forcing potential recruits to take “gender pronoun classes.”

Girl, what?

Despite her best efforts, Haley continues to be rejected by the anti-gay branch of the GOP. Look no further than her attempt to be the most homophobic person at the last Republican debate, only to be attacked for her phrasing.

Haley declared Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” policy doesn’t go far enough, which didn’t lead to right-wing applause.

Instead, she was criticized for using a “left-wing talking point.”

Haley may not be a Democrat, but she does seem to be a faker! Her performative act extends all the way to her husband’s name, which again, isn’t real.

Just like her chances of catching Trump…