Ralf Schumacher’s ex-wife describes all-too-common pain women feel when their gay husbands come out

Ralf Schumacher came out publicly as gay — and in love with his boyfriend — several weeks ago, to a chorus of accolades and support.

Yet the former Formula 1 driver’s ex-wife wasn’t as thrilled.

Cora Schumacher has shared with the German publication Spiegel that she is not a fan of how her ex-husband publicly shared the news that he is gay. She alleged in the interview that Ralf gave her no notice that he would be publicly sharing his relationship with his boyfriend, Etienne — effectively coming out.

“That was such a stab in the heart,” Cora told Spiegel.

Get off the sidelines and into the game

Our weekly playbook is packed with everything from locker room chatter to pressing LGBTQ sports issues.
Subscribe to our Newsletter today

She also talked about the depth of pain and distance she felt during their marriage, and since, as she struggled to experience the love and relationship she wanted from a marriage.

Related

Ralf Schumacher thankful for support after coming out as gay, as son sends loving message
Former F1 driver Ralf Schumacher posted a new photo alongside his boyfriend Etienne after a flood of positive responses to their news.

“After the birth of our son, I felt like an old pair of sneakers that had been thrown in the corner. I felt lonely and longed for more closeness and affection. I tried to explain it to myself in the way a 24-year-old girl thinks: It’s your fault, maybe you’re too fat or too ugly or just not good enough,”

Compounding the problem for Cora were the rumors that her husband was, in fact, gay. They were rumors that Ralf denied for years, even denying them directly to Cora when asked.

“These rumors got worse over the years,” she said. “I think I just closed my eyes. I married for love. I wanted this life so much.”

Cora’s struggles, both during the marriage and now with these decade-old rumors confirmed publicly by Ralf, reflect the damage society’s homophobia and pressures to “be straight” have on straight people, and in particularly women.

Cora’s story isn’t uncommon. It often goes like this…

Closeted gay man struggles with his sexuality, feels pressured by family/friends/society to marry a woman, does so and continues to struggle with being gay. Eventually, the man’s sexuality becomes too much for him to ignore, and he either 1) has sex with men outside the marriage, or 2) he divorces his wife all together and finds life with a man.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Ralf Schumacher (@ralfschumacher_rsc)

Either way, the straight woman who had found love — and she thought an entire life — with the man of her dreams is left searching for answers that can be so hard to reconcile. She can so often feel betrayed, lied to, left wondering what of her marriage was “real.”

Also like so many straight spouses left behind when their partner comes out, Cora has found a hope for well-wishes for Ralf.

Yet Cora’s story is yet another that points to the need for society to allow for everyone to find love and happiness how they see fit. Because eventually, and in today’s Western societies almost without exception, they are going to do just that. Better they figure out who they are and pursue happiness in their teens and 20s, than married with kids in their 40s and 50s.

The post Ralf Schumacher’s ex-wife describes all-too-common pain women feel when their gay husbands come out appeared first on Outsports.