More shady shenanigans from gay-hating, bribe-loving Justice Clarence Thomas

Where in the world is Justice Clarence Thomas?

That’s what everyone was wondering on Monday when the gay-hating, 75-year-old SCOTUS justice was MIA from work without any explanation. He also didn’t participate remotely in any arguments, as justices often do when they can’t be there in person.

Chief Justice John Roberts announced Thomas’ absence Monday morning but didn’t say why he was out or when he might be returning, leaving everyone to wonder. The court usually gives a reason for a justice’s absence, including when they need to take a sick day.

Then on Tuesday, Thomas, who loves a bribe almost as much Brett Kavanaugh loves beer, was back… just in time to hear arguments in a case related to the January 6 insurrection. But still not explanation was given as to why he was out in the first place.

Yesterday, Joseph Fischer, who was among those that stormed the U.S. Capitol at Donald Trump‘s behest to try and overturn the 2020 election results, argued that the Supreme Court should dismiss a charge against him of obstruction of an official proceeding.

Fischer is one of 330 January 6 defendants facing that particular charge. He has pleaded not guilty and is currently awaiting trial.

Depending on how SCOTUS rules on the matter, it could also impact the federal case against Trump, who himself is charged with conspiracy to defraud the United States government and conspiracy to obstruct an official proceeding.

During yesterday’s oral arguments, Thomas appeared to show sympathy for Fischer (and the other insurrections… and people who participate in violent protests, in general) when he asked: “There have been many violent protests that have interfered with proceedings. Has the government applied this provision to other protests in the past?”

The question raised alarm bells for many given Thomas’ own MAGA-obsessed wife Ginny’s involvement in January 6. In the days leading up to the insurrection, she sent over 20 totally-not-crazy-sounding texts to Trump’s then-chief of staff Mark Meadows, like this one:

Biden crime family & ballot fraud co-conspirators (elected officials, bureaucrats, social media censorship mongers, fake stream media reporters, etc) are being arrested & detained for ballot fraud right now & over coming days, & will be living in barges off GITMO to face military tribunals for sedition.

In addition to that, Ginny exchanged multiple messages with John Eastman, Trump’s lawyer who drafted a memo outlining a plan to subvert the electoral process.

She also sent frantic emails to at least two Wisconsin state lawmakers and nearly 30 Arizona state lawmakers urging them to ignore Joe Biden’s popular vote victory and “choose” presidential electors instead.

Oh, and she attended Trump’s pre-insurrection rally on the Ellipse before going home because she “got cold” and probably needed a snack.

Ginny later denied ever discussing any of her post-election/pre-insurrection activities with her husband, calling it “laughable for anyone who knows my husband to think I could influence his jurisprudence.”

Next week, the Supreme Court will hear arguments over whether Trump has “absolute immunity” from prosecution for anything illegal he may or may not have done while serving in the White House.

U.S. District Judge Tanya Chutkan already rejected his immunity claim back in December, as did the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit in February. SCOTUS, whose 6-3 conservative majority includes three justices appointed by Trump, will now have the final say.

Given him and his wife’s undying affection for the one-term, twice-impeached, quadruply-indicted ex-president, we’re pretty sure we already know how Thomas is gonna rule on the matter.

Assuming he shows up for work that day.